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Tuesday, December 31, 2013

Greetings- New year sa tanang bisaya, bisdak

HAPPY NEW YEAR TO ALL!  May the new year bring so much hope and abundance for all of us. God bless you as you face the new year.

MALIPAYONG BAG-ONG TUIG KANINYONG TANAN!

Hinaut ang bag-ong tuig mudala ug abunda ug kamaya sa atong tanan.


Friday, December 27, 2013

Bisaya jokes 25, 2013 --- Bisaya translations of movie titles

1 Dead Man’s Chest – Atngal sa Laki nga Namatay
2 Million Dollar Baby – Anak ni Bill Gates
3 Snakes on a Plane – Nag-eroplano ang Akong Traydor nga Higala
4 Swordfish – Daing sa Bantayan
5 Pretty Woman – “Akong Uyab”
6 The Good, the Bad and the Ugly – Ako, Ikaw, Kamong Tanan
7 Click – Gituslok
8 Brokeback Mountain – Buktot sa Bukid
9 The Day of the Dead – Kalag-kalag
10 Waterworld – Tubig-tubig
11 There’s Something About Mary – Naay kuan si Maria sa iyang kuan
12 Employee of the Month – Ang Sipsip
13 Resident Evil – Akong Ugangan Niipon Namo
14 Kill Bill – Patya ang Maningil og Bayad sa Utang
15 Nightmare Before Christmas – Giorum sa wa pay Pasko
16 Never Been Kissed – Bati’g Nawong
17 Gone in 60 Seconds – Daling Nagawsan, Nidagan
18 The Fast and the Furious – Nabitin, Nasuko
19 Too Fast, Too Furious – Nabitin na sad, Nisamot Kasuko
20 Beauty and the Beast – Akong Uyab ug ang Among Silingan
21 Lost In Space – Wa Katugpa
22 Paycheck – Sweldo
23 What Lies Beneath – Namakak sa Silong
24 Cinderella Man – Bayot d i si Cinderella
25 Charlie and the Chocolate Factory – Charlie ug ang Iyang Pabrika sa Lapuk
26 Men In Black – Mga Laki nga Itom ug Bugan
27 X-Men, The Last Stand – Mga Laki nga Nabayot Kay di na Utgan
28 The Day After Tomorrow – Balik lang Sunod Ugma
29 Catch Me If You Can – Gukod!
30 Die Another Day – Basin Ugma pa Siya Mamatay
31 The Rock – Ang Shabu
32 In the Line of Fire – Nilatay sa Alambri nga Nagkayo
33 Saturday Night Fever – Sabado sa Gabii, Gihilantan
34 Police Academy – Iskwelahan sa mga Dagkog Tiyan
35 Dante’s Peak – Ang Tumoy sa tudlo ni Dante
36 Legends of the Fall – Ang Istorya sa mga Nalamba
37 The Forgotten – Ang Nakalimtan nga Utang
38 Charlie and the Chocolate Factory – Ang Sikwati ni Choy
39 Star Wars – The Buzz
40 An Inconvenient Truth – Kalibangun Ko
41 Blood Diamond – Nasamad si M’ Lhuillier
42 Disturbia – Nagregor Hinuon
43 Eagle Eye – Manokon ug Mata
44 Saving Private Ryan – Ang Pikoy ni Ryan Giluwas
45 Flags of Our Fathers – Si Papa Toa Nag Sea Man
46 Good Luck Chuck – Mayntag Nakapasar si Choy
47 Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix – Si Harry Potter ni Order ug Lechon Manok
48 HellBoy – Batang Yawa
49 Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull – Indiana Jones ug ang Kaharian sa Pocherong Shabu
50 Da Vinci Code – Da Vinci’s Pizza 253-3893
51 Lions For Lambs – Leon Gi Swapan ug Mga Karnero
52 Little Miss Sunshine – Little Miss Hollow Block
53 Love in the Time of Cholera – Gugma sa Panahong Giatay
54 No Country For Old Men – Walay Nasod Para Sa Mga Baog
55 Speed Racer – PUJ
56 The 40 Year Old Virgin – Bayot Ka! Gibarikos Pa Jud!
57 The Constant Gardener – Ang Hardinerong Kogihan
58 The Devil Wears Prada – Ang Yawa Tig Ukay-Ukay
59 The Fast and the Furious – Ang Isnatcher ug ang Na-Snatchan
60 Iron Man – Kawatan ug Puthaw
61 The Pursuit of Happyness – Nangabang sa Junquera
62 The Sisterhood of the Travelling Pants – Akong Skinny Jeans Gi Palo ni Ate
63 Walk the Line – Latay sa Alambre
64 Dawn of the Dead – Ang Ongo nisayo sa Pasil!

Thursday, December 19, 2013

Bisaya jokes 24, 2013

Merry Christmas sa tanan! I hope that you are enjoying your Christmas celebrations with family and friends. Always remember that Christmas is about the child who was born to be the Saviour of those who would believe.

Here are some bisaya, binisaya, bisdak jokes for you. These are not mine. These are from: http://www.boybanat.com/2012/04/visayan-funny-jokes-and-bisaya-cebuano.html You can click on this link and check out more bisaya jokes.



Teacher: Class if basura ko asa man ko ninyo ilabay, nabubulok o di nabubulok?
Dingdong: ay sa di nabubulok ma’am.
Teacher: ngano man DD?
Dingdong: ay, alangan kay plastic man ka ma’am.
 ======================================================
 Sa Math Class..
Teacher: kung naa koy 1 ka piraso nga karne ug tungaon nako, pila na ka piraso?
Juan: 2 mam!
Teacher: at kung tungaon pa nko preho?
Juan: 4 na mam!
Teacher: tungaon pjud nko?
Juan: 8 na mam!
Teacher:Tungaon pjud nko?
Juan: 16 na mam!
Teacher: 2ngaon pjud nko?
Juan: 32 na mam!
Teacher: kung 2ngaon pjud?
Juan: 64! (suko na)
Teacher: ug tungaon pjud ug kduha?
Juan: Ipagaling na lang na mam ky malangan natah...
 ======================================================
 Dunky: Dingdong, pang exam man kayo na emong ngipon..
Dingdong: Ha? Ngano man?
Dunky: One set apart hehehe…
Dingdong: Kana pud emong ngipon bai pang exam pud kayo
Dunky: Ngano man pud?
Dingdong: Feel in the blanks..
======================================================
Mama: Nak, nganung ngkabulingit man ka?
Anak: kabantay ka anang kanal dri ma?
Mama: Oo nak, kbantay ko. Nganu man?
Anak: ako wla.
======================================================
Boy: nganu mura man kag nhadlok?
Girl: hapit kako ma rape diha sa unahan, may gani koy kwarta.
Boy: unya emu na lang gihatag imung kwarta?
Girl: wala ui ng hotel mi. lain sad kau diha rmmi sa daplin.
 ======================================================
Judge: Pedro, unsa man jud ang nahitabo?
Pedro: (wala ni tingog)
Judge: tubaga ang question!
Pedro: ingon hearing lang ni! Ngano naay Speaking? 
=======================================================

Tuesday, December 17, 2013

Bisaya Christmas Songs

Here is a video of some Christmas songs in Binisaya or bisaya or Cebuano language. It is a joy to hear songs in a language one knows. Language has its own unique effect on people because it is part of identity as a person belonging to a race. Language is belongingness. Please enjoy these Bisaya or bisdak songs.


Wednesday, December 11, 2013

Bisaya jokes 23, 2013

Baye: manong, can you get my bagahe please? it’s like mabigat kasi eh.
KONDUKTOR: Diin ani miss?
Baye: there oh! yong SAKO! Please pAki ingat lang kasi if it falls to da ground mahirap magpulot..ng "KOFRAS”

YABAG!

=========================================================

Kulas: Nganong nabukol man na imong ulo, Bay?
Baduy: Nangharana man gud ko gabii didto sa ilang Marilou, Bay Kulas. Pagsugod nako'g kanta, giitsahan dayon ko ni Marilou ug buwak.
Kulas: Pero nganong nabukol man ka?
Baduy: Ang buwak gisud man gud ug kaang.

=========================================================
Teacher: Tikyo unsa may generic name sa biogesic?
Toryo : Paracetamol ma'am. Ma,am, (Si Tikyo ang nangutana sa teacher), Unsa may generic name sa condom?
Teacher : Naa bay generic nang condom Tikyo?
Toryo : Naa ma'am oi. PARASATUMOY.

=========================================================
Anak: "tay, tinood ng multo?
Tatay: "dili nak.. nganu nanghutana man ka?"
Anak: "ingon man gud ni yaya daghan daw multo diri"
Tatay: "ay pastilan! mag impake ta! wala tay yaya!" Dalia Dong!
=========================================================

Friday, December 6, 2013

Bisaya Jokes 22, 2013



The joke below is an example of how an ordinary conversation or joke session would end up to something that is not necessary. People take things at times too personal that it results to fights or ruined relationships. When it comes to jokes don't take as personal attack. hahhahahhaha Jokes are jokes. Don't take too seriously. They are meant to make us have fun and laugh.
 
 BF: Honey, mura kag Selecta, you’re so yummy!
GF: Aw, ikaw babe mura kag Krispy Kreme, you’re so sweet!
BF: Kanindot, ikaw mura kag Starbucks, so addictive!
GF: Ikaw mura kag Jollibee, langhap sarap.
BF: Mura kag Mang Inasal, affordable.
GF: Haha. Mura kag pongko2, slightly dirty.
BF: Ikaw mura kag pinirito, oily!
GF: Mura kag sinugba, negro!
BF: Mura kag buwad, parehas mog baho!
GF: Mura kag inun-unan, parehas ka aslum sa imong bugan!
BF: Ikaw ginamos!
GF: Ikaw bugok nga itlog!
BF: Pan-os ka!
GF: Sinuka sa hubog!
BF: Tae!
GF: Buwag nata!
BF: Maypa!

 ============================================
BATA: Nang..nang..papalita gud ko ug juice be..
TINDIRA: Kanang naa sa powder ta??
BATA: Ngano man nang? Naa ba diay kay juice nga bareta..
Hala ka diha!
 =============================================
Giputlan ni Juan ug isa ka tiil ang langaw.
JUAN: Lupad!!
Nilupad ang langaw.
Giputol niya ang tanan tiil.
JUAN: Lupad!!
Nilupad ang langaw.

Giputol niya ang pako sa langaw
JUAN: Lupad! Lupad! .... LUPAD!
Wala nakalupad ang langaw.

JUAN: I therefore conclude, nga ang langaw, kung putlan ug paku....
MABUNGOL..

What a conclusion! My! my! my!
 ======================================================
Anak: Tay, nganong kanang atong mga baktin maglakaw nga magduko man?
Amahan:
Naulaw na sila, Dong, nga kaliwat sila ug baboy.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Tuesday, December 3, 2013

Kamunggay Blond bitch talk

Hahahahahhaha nalingaw ra ko aning duha tungod sa kamunggay ug sa ilang pagsuhid sa mga amirikanang kiat musulti.